What can you learn from the Celebrity Apprentice?

I like watching the Apprentice because the show pushes you to think what would you say or do when you were put in a similar challenging position. By getting celebrities on the show, it just gives you a better reason to watch it and makes the show more entertaining.

In the latest episode, the challenge is to do fundraising by creating a whole-day work-out routine for 24-hour Fitness. The more favorable routine will be honored $24,000 by the gym, and whichever team raise the most money will win the challenge. The difficult part is that you have to have one person physically coming in for the training class to represent each donation.

Somewhat surprisingly, though Tenacity was the bigger fund raiser, Rock Solid was favored by the gym. What would you walk away with this experience then? Let’s focus on the gym routine.

1. Have a good theme
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How NOT to make the same mistake in a night club or at a conference.

I’m sure you’ve been through this before. You walk into the night club with one of your girlfriends, and then 10 minutes later she started talking to this really cute guy and basically you’re left alone for the rest of the night.

I bet you don’t want to put your girlfriend in the same situation. But there is a spark with that guy, and you really want to talk to him and dance with him. So now what?

You SHOULD talk to the guy and dance, for sure, but not too much. The important thing is to raise that interest and curiosity and then leave with him wanting more. Go back to your girlfriend and enjoy the rest of the night. If he is into you, you will get a message in due time. If he doesn’t contact you or you don’t even bother to leave your contact, then I would be really surprised you were hesitating getting back to your girlfriend in the first place.

Now think about a conference you just attended. After a really good panel discussion, you so want to talk to this panelist who is so bright, so knowledgeable, so insightful with what he has to say. You’re not the only one though. So now what?

Instead of blocking other people from talking to the panelist and asking one question after another, I suggest you focus on leaving a positive and strong impression with a few sentences about yourself and just one question (something connects what he does and what you do). After his answer, politely thank him for his time and ask to exchange business card.

Go back home and relax. Write to the panelist in a few days, remind him how you met and ask for an opportunity to call him/visit his office/arrange a coffee chat, etc. Chances are you will be able to lock in a good amount of his time one-on-one.

Respect your other friends in the night club or other attendees at the conference: you will only achieve something better for yourself.

How to Play the "Unfair" Card

It is almost funny how often I hear the phrase "it's unfair for other people."

At college, if you want to due your homework late, the professor will tell you “it’s unfair for the other students” in the same class, who may have skipped their friend’s birthday parties over the weekend to finish the paper.

At work, if you don’t copy other members on your team when you send out an email to someone in another group, if anything goes wrong, your manager will tell you “it’s not fair for him/her or anyone else on the team” because they were not involved in the first place and were not able to correct you in a timely manner, and now everyone looks bad in front of some other team.

Then I started to realize how powerful it is to pull the “unfair” card. I was once organizing a group trip to the west coast and someone decided to pull out last minute due to budget concerns. Besides everything else I said, I told him, “this is not fair for everyone else who committed to the trip” and who believed the price will be at $XX for the hotel, now with you not going, everyone else will have to pay extra.

He ended up going of course, and he had a blast.

Want It, Earn It

It really does not feel like a New Year, definitely not another decade, maybe still somewhere in 2008. I stared at the time on the bottom right of my computer for a long time today, and I said so to myself.

I just had a call with IRS, after waiting online for like 10 minutes, of course. Apparently I never received my tax return for 2008. I put down the direct deposit information but it was still scheduled to be delivered as a check. The representative told me that it was actually mailed out by the end of May, 2009, to my building, but for some reason it did not include my apartment number on it. He asked me to mail over 3911 to initiate the tracing process and they will find out what exactly happened to my check. And if it is the case that the check is lost and not cashed out, they will issue another refund.

I am pretty happy about the call. I am happy because I made the call. I couldn’t stop but thinking what if I don’t, what if I am just too lazy or I am too afraid to reach out to other people to understand what exactly happened, then I would never be able to get that refund. The case will just be dropped, and forgotten. Like many other things in this world.

If you don’t stand up for yourself, nobody else will. If you don’t make an effort to earn it, it only means you don’t want it that much to start with.

Office politics can be challenging but also interesting. But honestly the fundamental rule is: get your job done, and get it done very well. Especially for junior employees, everything else comes after this. But then there is how much initiative you are taking. Are you waiting for assignments or asking for them. When you are asking the help from someone else, what can you offer them back. If you need to get something done urgently, you simply send out an email, or you email, and call, and IM, or maybe use some closer contact in that department to make sure it will get done. It will make some differences, and could be big differences, and eventually this is how you build up your reputation.

And if you don’t have one, before pointing at other people, why don’t you ask yourself if you’ve made a good effort to earn it.

Maybe totally unrelated, so I have to switch my apartment soon so I used a broker. Apparently he’s screwing me up by asking me for a higher rent and then telling me he has lowered the rent but I have to give him the payment difference upfront in order for him to get the deal, while in fact, the rents are toward the lower end to start with. I didn’t think too much about it in the beginning, but right before lease signing I was really convinced that it’s totally a spam and he’s just asking for a broker fee in a fishy way.

I was pretty pissed, but I remained calm, and polite. I refused to pay the extra, and I made strong and reasonable arguments and listed all the numbers and references. I ended up not paying the extra fees of course, and the broker was not happy. Fine, but that is not my fault, because he was not being honest about the hidden fees to start with and if I was nice and stupid to pay the fees, it’s only unfair and I wouldn’t think I were being financially responsible to myself.

M randomly called me the other night, and popped the question if I am happy. I said to be honest I AM pretty happy. He was surprised, how come you work in finance and still can be happy? And what does pretty happy mean anyways? I wish this IB trader could see my face. I said on a scale of 100, it is between 85-90. He said that is really high, I was thinking about slightly over 50. For a second I didn’t know what to say, but I knew I was giving an honest answer.

W was yelling at me again. Actually if I were not there, she will probably yell to the air, or to the walls, or to the sink. If someone asks the same happiness question to W, she will probably answer 0 (or maybe 0.1), I am not joking. Some people are just not happy. No matter how much they achieve, how much money they have, how many friends are around them, they simply do not have the fundamental source of happiness within themselves. And they are so surprised to see why other people, those who might not even be as well-off as they are, could be so happy, so then they freak out, and they hate other people, and they become unhappier.

I am sorry but who do you put the blame if you don’t even want to be happy yourself? I am sorry if you actually do want to be happy why I do not see you even trying?!

I think the most encouraging compliment you can give a person is that “you are a really motivated young man”. For those who are constantly worried for nothing, or too lazy to actually do anything, please refer to the following:

If you want something so badly, you will earn it eventually. If you really want the best for yourself, it will happen to you.

And if you don’t, then you sure as hell do not deserve it.