Want It, Earn It

It really does not feel like a New Year, definitely not another decade, maybe still somewhere in 2008. I stared at the time on the bottom right of my computer for a long time today, and I said so to myself.

I just had a call with IRS, after waiting online for like 10 minutes, of course. Apparently I never received my tax return for 2008. I put down the direct deposit information but it was still scheduled to be delivered as a check. The representative told me that it was actually mailed out by the end of May, 2009, to my building, but for some reason it did not include my apartment number on it. He asked me to mail over 3911 to initiate the tracing process and they will find out what exactly happened to my check. And if it is the case that the check is lost and not cashed out, they will issue another refund.

I am pretty happy about the call. I am happy because I made the call. I couldn’t stop but thinking what if I don’t, what if I am just too lazy or I am too afraid to reach out to other people to understand what exactly happened, then I would never be able to get that refund. The case will just be dropped, and forgotten. Like many other things in this world.

If you don’t stand up for yourself, nobody else will. If you don’t make an effort to earn it, it only means you don’t want it that much to start with.

Office politics can be challenging but also interesting. But honestly the fundamental rule is: get your job done, and get it done very well. Especially for junior employees, everything else comes after this. But then there is how much initiative you are taking. Are you waiting for assignments or asking for them. When you are asking the help from someone else, what can you offer them back. If you need to get something done urgently, you simply send out an email, or you email, and call, and IM, or maybe use some closer contact in that department to make sure it will get done. It will make some differences, and could be big differences, and eventually this is how you build up your reputation.

And if you don’t have one, before pointing at other people, why don’t you ask yourself if you’ve made a good effort to earn it.

Maybe totally unrelated, so I have to switch my apartment soon so I used a broker. Apparently he’s screwing me up by asking me for a higher rent and then telling me he has lowered the rent but I have to give him the payment difference upfront in order for him to get the deal, while in fact, the rents are toward the lower end to start with. I didn’t think too much about it in the beginning, but right before lease signing I was really convinced that it’s totally a spam and he’s just asking for a broker fee in a fishy way.

I was pretty pissed, but I remained calm, and polite. I refused to pay the extra, and I made strong and reasonable arguments and listed all the numbers and references. I ended up not paying the extra fees of course, and the broker was not happy. Fine, but that is not my fault, because he was not being honest about the hidden fees to start with and if I was nice and stupid to pay the fees, it’s only unfair and I wouldn’t think I were being financially responsible to myself.

M randomly called me the other night, and popped the question if I am happy. I said to be honest I AM pretty happy. He was surprised, how come you work in finance and still can be happy? And what does pretty happy mean anyways? I wish this IB trader could see my face. I said on a scale of 100, it is between 85-90. He said that is really high, I was thinking about slightly over 50. For a second I didn’t know what to say, but I knew I was giving an honest answer.

W was yelling at me again. Actually if I were not there, she will probably yell to the air, or to the walls, or to the sink. If someone asks the same happiness question to W, she will probably answer 0 (or maybe 0.1), I am not joking. Some people are just not happy. No matter how much they achieve, how much money they have, how many friends are around them, they simply do not have the fundamental source of happiness within themselves. And they are so surprised to see why other people, those who might not even be as well-off as they are, could be so happy, so then they freak out, and they hate other people, and they become unhappier.

I am sorry but who do you put the blame if you don’t even want to be happy yourself? I am sorry if you actually do want to be happy why I do not see you even trying?!

I think the most encouraging compliment you can give a person is that “you are a really motivated young man”. For those who are constantly worried for nothing, or too lazy to actually do anything, please refer to the following:

If you want something so badly, you will earn it eventually. If you really want the best for yourself, it will happen to you.

And if you don’t, then you sure as hell do not deserve it.